Turning Prey Villainy

The guilt is faint, in depth with in the heart. I know I'm wrong but my fucked up life keep fucking me up. This person built up within, the hidden pride.
I just wait for her to die inside, I never accept. I know I'm wrong, don't want to hurt her but I've been a cheat. I think I've gone too deep or has it become a lifestyle maybe it's something superstitious.
She's been pleading over and over, declaring what she had for me and still have. I know she's right but I'm wrong and I've been looking for this opportunity. An opportunity to end this cause I've been a bad person all along. I don't want to accept to a 2nd person, cause I can't handle been on the lower side. But I've accepted my wrongs  deep inside, can't bear to be judged by someone else or someone to remove the mask successfully. But judging myself, I'm killing me and and also her.
She's a nice person, probably saw through all. Probably the security on my privacy made it obvious that I was taken by someone else and still on the market. When she opened up her strangling secrets of the past, the fact that she's known and all that. "Yeah, the day has come, she's finally made the awaited mistake". I've been waiting for this for a while, a lie will cover it up. A cheat has some many cousins. But this time, I was to justify my wrongs with a lie, then free her from 'me-burden'. I always end up turning my victims to the villain and taking shelter of innocence in my past downturns by these villains that I created so I give my story she becomes the villain that's now prying on a weakened soul then I end it. I always have this character to my converted villains that keep them villainy, a strong opposing 1 cos you're the villain now and I have to keep strong to oppose you. I've created a lot so I know how to handle them,  I just repeat anon, even though this 1 calls only 1ce back but the next time I tell her she's been disturbing. It's a routine, I've done it with others so it's just to be repeated.
Maybe she doesn't realize. At least, you're free now. You don't realize, I've done you a favour and kept my visible secret. At least, I cared about you to push you away from my darkness while I move out to ravage another soul with my cursed personality. You keep on coming, pleading but I just freed you, my act of love. At least now I can prey on others cause I'm caused with this charm that will turn preys villainy.